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Room for on-line sex video chat SierraFun
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Languages: en,de,fr
Birth Date: 1995-07-12
Body Type: bodyTypeAthletic
Ethnicity: ethnicityWhite
Hair color: hairColorBlonde
Eyes color: eyeColorGreen
Subculture: subcultureRomantic
Date: November 3, 2022
She sounds abusive. No one who truly loves someone would belittle them like that. Verbal abuse is real and it is detrimental to your mental health. Please seek help. Your SO should never ever berate, belittle, or rage on you. She sounds like she can't regulate her emotions. She is a 33 year old grown ass woman who should've learned that long ago. You are a young and sound like a good person. You deserve to be happy and truly loved. Would you be happy if the person you love the most was in a relationship like yours? If not, then why do you allow this for yourself? You deserve better.
It sounds like your mom is being abused and isolated by your stepfather…not that that excuses her marrying someone who abused her child.
Are you getting professional help? This is a huge burden to bear, but a good therapist can help guide you.
As a man who loves, if a female asked me, I would say no. Think what you will, I would never do that to myself or partner. If you don't break up for him being unfaithful, what do you break up over. If he was faithful, you wouldn't be confused.
Good luck, stay blessed, and in my opinion he couldn't have any value for you based off his actions
I'll tell you what to say to Husband further below. First, a little perspective.
Something I often suspect in such an age gap, but can rarely prove, is that the older one NEEDS the role of Senior Partner, and the status, privileges, powers and perks that comes with it. Your story provides the proof. Husband has this need.
Of course, he understands that with power comes responsibility. His formula is simple: carry out your responsibility, and Junior Partner will appreciate what she gets when she willingly surrenders equality to your protection and leadership. But fail, as he believes he did, and Junior Partner will learn that she has surrendered equality to you for nothing.
You clearly haven't come to that same conclusion. So, with respect, if you go on valuing his leadership, and do not feel you've paid too great a price for it, I suggest you tell him that the maturity he brings to the marriage is what matters to you, and if that maturity arrives at a time in life when younger men have more muscle, you still consider it a good trade, and have no regrets.
Finally, a surprise: I hope you ignore my advice. I join most readers here who are more than a little concerned about the marriage bargain you've made, in which you're the lesser of two equals, and probably always will be. TBH, I really hope you find equality in marriage, if not with this Husband, than with his successor. But I can't say with moral certainty that this bargain is fatally flawed. Some Junior Partners feel the need for leadership just as strongly as their Senior feels the need to be the Leader. For the answer to that riddle, don't rely on Reddit. That's a know-thyself deal, for sure, and you need to look inside, long and hot.
He shouldn't have to stop his dating life because his ex wife is butt hurt about the divorce. She needs to grow tf up and focus on their child
If she thinks she can do it better OP, you tell her fine, you do it all. She will change her tune, or she will try to manipulate you into a evil hearted person for “giving up.” Or now your just the lazy husband. Excuse my French here, but Fuck. That. Shit. You tell her the lay of the land and now you feel, and if she doesn’t like it tell her to hit the highway.
well I have seen results myself so I doubt its scam. Not talking about creams and promises of 2 inches in a month. I am talking about slow tissue expansion and multiplication through tension applied over time. Same principles as ear stretching and neck stretching done for thousands of years. It has some danger to it for sure. But when done correctly I think is as safe as working out is.
Yeah March y22, and the app happened dec y21 but didn’t find out until a little way back. Half these comments saying im uptight and overblowing it the other opposite. Guess that’s Reddit for ya
Your husband is insane.
One, that is not how marriage should work; tit for tat is a terrible mentality towards doing things for your partner, and for your family.
Two, if you stayed home to watch a child, that was not him paying like he was splurging on you; that was him benefiting financially (and more) because he didn’t have to pay someone else to watch the kid or worry about them in any way.
He needs to get his head out of his ass. He sounds like a petty child, and I don’t know how old he is, but you need to put your foot down and tell him that this petty bean-counting bullshit has to end. He wasn’t “spoiling“ you; he was helping provide for his fucking family while you generously stayed home and didn’t earn an income so that he didn’t have to worry about childcare. He can go fuck himself with that bullshit of acting like he was doing you a favor.
He needs to rethink his approach, pronto; it’s time to have a serious conversation with him.
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Politics is running so many relationships.
Advice? I mean you really have 2 choices, don't mention politics, or lose your sibling.
I don't see a tertiary option
We only know what “ he” is telling her and/or what OP is telling us. I have a feeling there’s more to the story & hubby is presenting this scenario as an indirect way to discuss marital problems with OP, as a way to deflect or offset the negative from him. AKA Triangulation
Yeah, it's already the next day and I'm feeling a lot better, mainly because no one is really interacting with each other, as I anticipated. I think I just needed some time and confidence in myself. Thank you for your response, it was relatable and I appreciate it 🙂
It’s not your fault and this is text book ABUSE. leave
I appreciate you explaining this. I’ve done a fair number of co-ed sports and never had separate changing areas not be a given. Really sounds like a hockey (and maybe football?) specific situation due to the amount of gear and having only a few women on a predominantly male team.
No I have no idea how rinks are built, I've just been playing hockey for years without ever having been to one.
In your example she would have been very selfish to join the military & support imperialism though
She has the right to do it, we have the right to call her immature for it.
^ Please think about this, OP! From what you've told us, he does sound like the kind of person who could very well hurt the dogs on purpose. Especially if he finds out that you're thinking of leaving him.
The fact that he's losing control and screaming at them is a very bad sign that he could escalate to physical abuse.
It would be safer for the dogs and for you if you can find them another home or a shelter.
I strongly believe this isn't the case though. I'm not worried about my girlfriends intentions. I'm not even that worried about the guy's intentions either. I'm most worried about her safety in general.
I don't know why this has been so massively downvoted.
I'll completely agree with you and add my 2 cents. My father cheated on my mother when I was 22 and I hate what he did, he treated us both like shit, BUT he was a great father up until that point in life. Our relationship has changed immensely but my mother never ever asked me to cut him out of my life, in fact she actively encourages me to maintain a relationship with him.
Your mum pulled the trigger when she asked you to choose. I’m sorry OP but getting over the rejection is her work to do. Making you choose is a red flag. She needs help, but you don’t have to be the one to give it. Sad but true.
thank you, i really appreciate you taking the time to talk this out with me. i sent her a text like you suggested, i turned off notifications as well because honestly i’m scared to read her response tomorrow. my therapist can’t do telehealth since she’s not licensed to practice in the country i moved to :/. my friend knows i’m in therapy and that i’ve been working on this stuff but i also mentioned that i’ll be working on it more. i think the drifting away with college thing is definitely true and it just makes me sad. i have some friends here and i know i’ll make more and get closer the longer im here but i really miss being so close with her. it’s a hot thing to express and i did it very incorrectly this time. i really appreciate your advice. thanks again
This all sounds like it was written by a teenager who never had sex
He is controlling.
End the relationship and get therapy. You should not feel at all guilty for having this boundary. He can take whatever justification he has for such a request with him when he leaves.
End the relationship and get therapy. You should not feel at all guilty for having this boundary. He can take whatever justification he has for such a request with him when he leaves.
I am not saying what he did is okay. It is so not, but I can’t help but look at both sides here. None of this would have happened if she had just stopped. It’s literally that simple.
It doesn’t matter WHAT she was trying to do, hug or otherwise—he was uncomfortable, but she didn’t care.
‘Especially when it is something as small as this…’
You invalidating his feelings over a hug—which obviously was a big thing to him—is just as disrespectful as her continuing.
‘She should have left him alone, yes. But the disproportionate response from him was disturbing.’
Can you not agree that this response would’ve never happened, if she had just backed off?
Can you tell me why she kept pushing him?
Can you tell me why her hug was so much more important than his need?
If the roles were reversed, and he was doing this to her instead of her doing it to him, so many would be congratulating her for standing up for herself by throwing elbows and boxes because he wouldn’t stop. No one would be saying that her response was disproportionate and disturbing.
So, he lashed out.
And now, she’s suddenly shocked. And then, for reasons I still can’t understand, she runs to Reddit, to tell the world about it, talking about her safety….
Again, I’m not saying what he did is okay. Clearly there are issues here, and they are not good together. Clearly, he needs to work on himself. But so does she. When someone says go away, when someone wants you to back off, you respect that.
SHE created this entire thing. Not him.
none of it would’ve happened.
Like I said, make it make sense.
Oh please. I'm so sick of men wimping out at the least little thing.
He's not just abandoning his wife but his child/ren also.
He needs to suck it up. She's promised to do the work she needs to do this time.
she's already a step mom
Certainly, and you keep coming back for more. Find someone new and better.
Seems like you've allowed this to go on too far. You need to stop being a doormat and set a boundary. If he lives with you he pays x amount of rent or utilities or he stops sleeping over more than once a week. If he's not interested in moving in time to break up and move on. Don't waste more of your time.
So a 35 something dated a teenager and had a baby. Anyone shocked that there’s a power dynamic issue here?
Stop having babies with her and grow up and do your own thing.
She didn’t want a partner, she wanted someone to impregnate her and babysit. Yikes on bikes man.
If his family truly “threw him under the bus” he may be in no hurry to tell them anything about his life. But you're not even a year into this so it wouldn't be time to “meet the parents” yet anyway. Hopefully if you do make it to that point his siblings will be cool and not tell their parents about your momentary loss of sanity and all that's decent. Using professional connections to hunt down someone's sister to complain about your love life is pretty gross. Maybe if you can be a pinnacle of rationality between now and 8 months or so from now he'll feel comfortable introducing you. At this point he's probably still pretty embarrassed.
People stay friends with their exes all the time. Just bc he used to love her doesn’t mean he still does jfc