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Languages: en
Birth Date: 1999-11-24
Body Type: bodyTypeThin
Ethnicity: ethnicityAsian
Hair color: hairColorBlack
Eyes color: eyeColorBlack
Subculture: subcultureRomantic
Date: October 28, 2022
Obviously, you don't have a lot of information, so I can't be sure. But this sounds like he's trying to make you feel insecure and indebted to him for staying with you, which is an abuse tactic. The idea is to make you feel so weak in the relationship you don't fight back or stand up for your self when he criticises you, and you don't push him around (a common paranoid fear of abusive men) because you believe he's the last man who will ever have you.
If that's why, just leave him. He's a virus who won't give you a single good day in your whole relationship.
Of you think there's another explanation, you need to make him explain WHY they said this, what they based this on, what he said to them to prompt them to say that, why so many of them are saying it, if they have ever said it to him about women he's dated before, whether he believes them, what he said back to them, and how he feels about their friendship now that they've said this.
I don't think it's worth being offended by. He praised your willingness to help people, just thinks you should pay more attention to those around you. Honestly, this is something that a huge part of the human population should work on so its definitely not just you.
why are you still with him if he cheated on you? you're checking his social media so often because you don't trust him, you don't trust him because he cheated on you, therefore, doesn't deserve to be trusted. have some self-respect and leave
So she should be trying to find a sugar daddy?.
You know what is right for you. I personally wouldn't be comfortable if my wife talked to a former boyfriend. No right or wrong answer here, you know what you can deal with.
Start separating the responsibilities. You buy and wrap your families g_ifts, and he's soley responsible for his families g_ifts.
As for your own g_ifts. Start a wish_list of things you want and tell him to pick g_ifts from that list going forward, tell him what sort of g_ifts you want for different occasions.
Edit: sorry for all the underscores, the bot filter is removing my comment due to using the word g_i_f_t
You are getting too old for this groomer
Because my Dad has said he doesn’t want to charge me rent as I’m a full time medical student
….what?
I mean the charisma is just oozing from this man. Who wouldn’t want to spend time listening to their almost 30 year old boyfriend reminisce on past hook ups?
But seriously, he’s gross. Who needs to talk about their past in front of the current partner that much. Would you like to sit through this for 5 more years? Because you’ve told him how you feel and he seems to not to care in the slightest.
I kept my exes name in our divorce mostly because it doesn't really matter to me and it's a pain in the ass to change it. He doesn't mind either. Don't worry about it.
He then moved to a different state for work
This is when your relationship ended. He literally moved away, started another life, and moved on.
She knows my concern, to detriment I have been expressing my concerns for her to seek regular help since day 1…..probably why she takes my suggestions are nagging.
I’m low on the spectrum and have severe OCD so my body/brain require me to fix things and fixate on things until I know all there is to know about said topic. I am not medicated, tried for a few years and it was not for me, made me feel like i as under the Zoloft cloud rather than out of it. It’s a blessing and a curse, but I’ve learned to handle it. It has made me very successful in my career but impacts my relationships as I tend to be a big mouth and not STFU!
Unfortunately she has no family, that is the root of the trauma. Her home life was something so thought only happened I. Movies until we met and I saw that it was actually some peoples realities. She has a sister but she isn’t terribly supportive as she has her own traumas she deals with.
I couldn't read all of that because it was long and self centered. Look at how many times you said “I”. Also I'm confused about references to friendship for a partner.
Distill to the bottom line: “I'm sorry for how I hurt you and thankful for everything I learned from you – including that I now need to work on myself to be a better partner in the future. I hope you find everything you're looking for because you deserve all that and more.”
Yea I went in too deep with him & we slept together a lot. That's how I fell for him. I know it's my fault for making myself vulnerable. It just sucks now every time I see him. My heart gets happy but my brain gets worried & warns me to stay away. It's so hot. I know how you feel. I hope you find peace & get over him. I hope I do too. ((((HUGS))))
There’s no recovery from this until she communicates with more skill then a toddler yelling because they don’t want to listen to reason. You can’t really win against someone who wants to argue, everything will be misconstrued in whatever way she wants to take it. She’s clearly not happy or willing to work on it, instead she seems to be directing her negative emotions at you, you’re not a verbal punching bag OP, you deserve better
Beggars can’t be choosers meaning, 99.99 percent of the women I have tried to court have been interested, so this little mishap at dinner is not enough of a problem for me to start all over
lol if you think giving up your child is our unresolved issue then you also been screwed by this world.
Whit, your BF's abusive behaviors and anger issues cannot be excused — but perhaps can be explained, especially if you would speak to a psychologist in your city. They may be due to his having very weak control over his own emotions (i.e., a lack of emotional skills he had no opportunity to learn in childhood). My exW has that problem. If that is an issue for your BF, you likely have been seeing the following 4 red flags.
The first is a strong abandonment fear. I therefore ask whether, a few months into your relationship, he started showing strong jealousy over harmless events — or started attempting to isolate you away from close friends and family? He would view your spending time with friends/family as your choosing THEM over HIM. Moreover, he usually would hate to be alone by himself.
Second, you would be seeing him rely heavily on black-white thinking, wherein he tends to categorize some people as “all good” (“with me”) or “all bad” (“against me”) and will recategorize them — in just a few seconds — from one polar extreme to the other based on a minor infraction.
Because he also uses B-W thinking when judging HIMSELF, he hates to acknowledge making a mistake. To him, it would mean he is “all bad.” He thus would blame nearly all mistakes on you and view himself as “The Victim.” Always “The Victim.”
Further, to “validate” his victim status, he would keep a detailed mental list of every infraction/mistake you ever did (real or imagined) and would not hesitate to pull out the entire list to defend himself in the most insignificant disagreement with you. Moreover, this B-W thinking also would be evident in his frequent use of all-or-nothing expressions like “you ALWAYS…” and “you NEVER….”
Third, you generally would not see him expressing his rages to casual friends, coworkers, or total strangers. He usually gets along fine with them. Rather, the outbursts and temper tantrums almost exclusively would be expressed against a close loved one (e.g., against you or his parents).
Fourth, you are convinced he truly loves you. But you often have seen him flipping, on a dime, between Jekyll (loving you) and Hyde (devaluing or hating you) — often making you feel like you're walking on eggshells. These flips would occur in a few seconds in response to some minor thing you say or do. And a few hours or days later, he could flip back just as quickly.
Whit, have you been seeing strong occurrences of all 4 of these red flags?
And what about him? Is he shredded? Is his diet impeccable? What is HE doing to be attractive to YOU?
Why are you upset that you got rid of this guy? You should open a bottle of good wine to celebrate.