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Date: September 26, 2022
How? It’s not bad enough to leave nor is it good enough to stay…
Oh ok, op is in the UK so the big home defense case for us was the Tony Martin one.
Yep, been there done that. Happily married for years because we are secure adults who don't act like middle schoolers.
So there’s 2 problems here.
Your bf is insecure about this, he may or may not be able to get over it, but you both will need to work together on this. He will need to trust you and physically and verbally prove this. You will need to ensure that you are acknowledging the trust, and also that you do not, through carelessness or stupidity put yourself in a position where the trust can be compromised. The fragile trust of an insecure person is easily broken unintentionally and when it breaks, proving yourself innocent is difficult if not impossible.
You need to find a way to incorporate your BF into your trips somehow. It is damaging to your relationship for you to be unavailable every weekend or more during the snowboarding season.
Yes you should be able to do your hobbies whenever you want, but if for 3 months or so of the year, you are not there on the weekends, or not able to do anything in the evenings because you are exhausted. it’s like a little leak in the balloon of your relationship, slowly but surely it’s going to deflate.
But if you can find a way to get your BF there (yes I know you say he’s not interested in learning, but surely there is other things to do there, and seeing you every hour or so between runs has got to be better than staying home knowing that it’s going to be months before you can have a date night again) then it’s a patch on the leak keeping your relationship afloat.
Your ex-bf is a saint. He put up with no sex for 6 months. You admitted you have zero to low sex drive. It’s not that he has a high sex drive. You have ZERO. That could work for some people. But it really doesn’t work for most people.
Seems like a tough but necessary decision. My only comment is that it sounds like you broke up over a phone call which seems like a harsh way to do it for such a serious relationship.
Well this I shitty behaviour on her part, but be aware that a gf/wife's hypothetical question will always stay in her mind so it truly never is hypothetical, be careful what you say.