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Blake, 22 y.o.
Location: Texas, United States
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Date: October 22, 2022
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She might also be timid on trusting a random stranger over he boyfriend. People lie to hurt people, she might think it’s a jealous ex or someone trying to break them up.
This is horrible situation all around. Your relationship is a disaster wether you are ready to admit it or not. You are way too young and already dealing with so many responsibilities… I feel truly sad for you. I wish there would have been somebody in your life that helped you make better decisions. But since that is not the case, it is up to YOU now to make better decisions for your daughter.
First, divorce. That relationship is going to do nothing, but bring you down. Your husband is barely out of his teens, but clearly, still having the maturity of one.
Secondly, focus on what you can do to give you and your daughter a better life. Have you finished school? Can you get a good job? If not, that is what you need to be putting your energy on! Not “where is my husband living?!?? ?”.
Third, stop focusing in the wrong things! Learn that love is NOT ENOUGH for a relationship to work and with that, I’ll leave you with this reflection I copy from ready some years ago… unfortunately I did not think of saving the user, but all credit for this masterpiece go to him:
“you need to understand that love is nowhere near a good enough reason to stay in a relationship. Ever. No exceptions. Love is not a good reason to stay.
Don’t you think that women and men who get punched in the face by their partners probably love them? And they stay because of that. Would you want your sister or mother or DAUGHTER to stay in an abusive relationship because they loved them? Of course not.
I’ll go a step further: Love isn’t that special. We’re taught that it is, but it isn’t. It’s not special or rare. Lots of people love their partners even when their partners treat them like shit, just like yours does. You will find someone else to love. It’s common.
You know what is NOT common? To be in a relationship with these traits in addition to love:
• respect • trust • transparency • compassion • honesty • a desire to ensure your partners needs are met and vice versa • both partners caring about each other’s comfort • healthy boundaries • transparency
So, if you have a relationship with EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THOSE THINGS in addition to love, then you stay. But you don’t. You don’t have all of those things in your relationship.
I’ll go even one step further. A relationship with all of those things WITHOUT love would be healthier than a relationship without any of those things but WITH love.
Okay, so here’s the test: when you’re in a relationship, ask yourself if you have love and everything else on that list. If you don’t, then you leave. Because a healthy relationship will have all of that. Every time. If you have a future relationship that does not have every single one of those things, then you’re in the wrong relationship.
It’s not easy or common to find that. It’s rare and it’s beautiful. But if you have love without those things, then you have a shitty relationship. And you should respect yourself enough to NEVER EVER EVER EVER stay in a shitty relationship. Ever.”
Focus on your recovery. When you have stable ground in your mind, you can worry about the rest.
it sounds like you may just not be compatible, at least not anymore. You're allowed to have wants and needs from a relationship. It'd be better if you realize that you two arent on the same page now rather than in another ten years after you've had kids (if thats something you want).
When I was a little younger than your bf, I had an older female boss who decided she like me more than just as a young employee. And she made sure to let me know. There’s a weird thing that can happen where you can justify actions because your boss is asking you to, even though you know it’s wrong.
I feel for your boyfriend. It’s entirely possible that he is being taken advantage of by his older superior at work. I’ve been there and it sucks. 11 years later and I still feel gross about what I allowed to happen and what I participated in.
Leave her. And tell your friends this story so they know to discharge the condoms themselves. Some people think women don't do these things and would never think to take care of their own condom. And from now on, put some Tabasco sauce in your condoms when you toss them. The acidity kills the sperm and it would teach any woman cruel enough to try and baby trap a man a good lesson on why not to.
Right? If her dad considered whether or not to invite her to an event and the major concern was whether or not she's “nonindigenous” enough for him, she'd be rightly furious. Racism is always racism, op, even against nonindigenous people.
Texting is not a committed relationship… you’re argument I’d void. Find something else to attempt to “justify” your actions.