Thanks, this is helpful. I am pretty certain the affair is over (I watched her send the message ending it) but everything else is spot on.
I'm not worried about DV accusations. Maybe everyone says that? Anyway I don't scream, I don't insult, but I still want to say everything I can that will hurt her.
Finances have been fully joint for many years. She makes more money but we're both very secure and I don't really worry much about that.
IC is scheduled but not for a few days. This is all super fresh. I will start doing some reading. Normally the very first thing I would do in any situation is go read about it, I guess this time I needed to vent first.
I appreciate your input. I know the hormones are crazy and I know her body isn't fully back to normal yet. I've said that in my post at least twice, saying that I expect to take more responsibility because of the condition childbirth has left her in.
My household has the same, if not more, help available to us than her parent's. The street I live on has 5 houses and they are all my immediate family that is willing to help, 2 households also have young kids of their own so it would be a great environment for my son to grow up in. Her family's house is much smaller than mine and 6 people live! there along with 3 dogs. It's not an ideal environment for a 2 month old to be living in. Thats why i'm not okay with letting this play out for a year or so, only to be told nothing will change if I don't give in to what shes asking. I also stated that for the first 2 weeks I slept every night at her parents house despite them treating me like garbage. I've made all the efforts I can and have stated that clearly in my post.
I've never given her an ultimatum or anything remotely close to that. I was just expecting her to make more of an effort to bring our new family together instead of keeping it long distance like it currently is.
According to my uncle, I didn’t absorb the twin. I’m not sure the details on how developed they were and how exactly they left – I’ve seen a sonogram of me in there by myself.
Answers – mostly just curiosity. Were we identical? Did we know a gender? What exactly happened? Why didn’t anyone tell me?
I’m sure it’s a tough subject and that’s partially why it never came up. But since I’ve never had a successful pregnancy, I’m also curious to know if it was just a fluke thing, an older mother thing (my mom was 37 when she had me), or something genetic that I should be more aware of
You don't break up for what someone did, you break up for who that person is.
You ought to talk with him about these sorts of things first and understand what his point of view is toward it.
If he's a good guy who treats you well and just made a mistake then that's one thing, but if he's a habitual derelict then that's when you should leave.
I'm American and I don't understand how he's going to correct you, last time I checked you guys invented English so our way of pronouncing is actually wrong. Australians got their own say of saying things too but neither are proper English. So maybe explain that to him.
It just sounds like he sucks at communicating. Have you told him that he needs to say something, defend the action or make an excuse for the action, he needs to communicate something to you about the issue.
Find out why he refuses to say something. If none of this works you have to decide if you can live with this behavior.
Does it matter at this point? He’s terrible to you, you clearly are miserable, and you know he’s a cheater. It doesn’t matter with who or if the kids are his, the point is he is awful and you need to leave him regardless. Let him deal with whatever fallout there is.
You just bring it up and say what’s on your mind. You are feeling bad. I don’t think it’s a big deal if she was feeling bad too. I’m sure her intentions were good but I would not get hot in suggestive poses in front of my husband’s friend. I would rather go to a stranger to do them if I was set on them rather then my husband’s friend, because I would assume my husband wouldn’t want his friend seeing me hard and in porn star poses. Your friend is also very shady for suggesting this to your wife behind your back. Bad vibes all around.
Also please note that boudoir is not typically very hot. As another commenter said, then are usually tasteful and suggestive. Not flat out nude. So your friend definitely pushed some boundaries and took things to an extreme.
This is a super shitty situation. I'm so sorry, OP.
On another note, you should really ask your wife if she signed any kind of documents before he took these pictures. Ask if he had her sign some sort of contract, model release, transfer of copyright, etc. This could very quickly become a more complicated situation if he decides to display these photos in his portfolio. While this is not legal advice and I am not a lawyer, I could see this going south and ending up in a court where he is arguing the copyright ownership and your wife is arguing for her right to privacy (depending on your location or course).
It is not always a bad thing. You should have some emotional awareness to not end up being a creep and ensure that you are with woman who actually wants you. I don't remember any such “hints of rejection” with my wife while I was dating her. But there may be too much of it, or you can even treat their signals wrongly. I would try improving your communication skills.
I feel like thank you isn’t enough to express my appreciation for your words. I am so excited for my future and my new relationship with myself. This past week I visited a rage room twice and had the time of my life. There are so many things I’m looking forward to do especially now that i can experience them fully as my own person. Thank you a million times. ❤️
What a tool. Sorry you had to find out, but better now than after being married with kids. Study very hot! The best revenge is a life well lived with love and happiness. Move on from this unpleasant human.
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He doesn’t respect or understand your boundaries… also his ultimatum clearly shows that he PICKED HER over you
Don’t worry about it , someone more mature would talk to you about being uncomfortable instead of what she did
You're splitting hairs over her wording and then throwing bible verses at her? Seriously? This has to be a troll
Thanks, this is helpful. I am pretty certain the affair is over (I watched her send the message ending it) but everything else is spot on.
I'm not worried about DV accusations. Maybe everyone says that? Anyway I don't scream, I don't insult, but I still want to say everything I can that will hurt her.
Finances have been fully joint for many years. She makes more money but we're both very secure and I don't really worry much about that.
IC is scheduled but not for a few days. This is all super fresh. I will start doing some reading. Normally the very first thing I would do in any situation is go read about it, I guess this time I needed to vent first.
They’re going to Europe
My little brother, pull your head out of that pink fog like immediately.
TIL…. Lol
I appreciate your input. I know the hormones are crazy and I know her body isn't fully back to normal yet. I've said that in my post at least twice, saying that I expect to take more responsibility because of the condition childbirth has left her in.
My household has the same, if not more, help available to us than her parent's. The street I live on has 5 houses and they are all my immediate family that is willing to help, 2 households also have young kids of their own so it would be a great environment for my son to grow up in. Her family's house is much smaller than mine and 6 people live! there along with 3 dogs. It's not an ideal environment for a 2 month old to be living in. Thats why i'm not okay with letting this play out for a year or so, only to be told nothing will change if I don't give in to what shes asking. I also stated that for the first 2 weeks I slept every night at her parents house despite them treating me like garbage. I've made all the efforts I can and have stated that clearly in my post.
I've never given her an ultimatum or anything remotely close to that. I was just expecting her to make more of an effort to bring our new family together instead of keeping it long distance like it currently is.
According to my uncle, I didn’t absorb the twin. I’m not sure the details on how developed they were and how exactly they left – I’ve seen a sonogram of me in there by myself.
Answers – mostly just curiosity. Were we identical? Did we know a gender? What exactly happened? Why didn’t anyone tell me?
I’m sure it’s a tough subject and that’s partially why it never came up. But since I’ve never had a successful pregnancy, I’m also curious to know if it was just a fluke thing, an older mother thing (my mom was 37 when she had me), or something genetic that I should be more aware of
I’ve done a lot of acid. It doesn’t make you accidentally cheat on anyone
You don't break up for what someone did, you break up for who that person is.
You ought to talk with him about these sorts of things first and understand what his point of view is toward it.
If he's a good guy who treats you well and just made a mistake then that's one thing, but if he's a habitual derelict then that's when you should leave.
I'm American and I don't understand how he's going to correct you, last time I checked you guys invented English so our way of pronouncing is actually wrong. Australians got their own say of saying things too but neither are proper English. So maybe explain that to him.
It just sounds like he sucks at communicating. Have you told him that he needs to say something, defend the action or make an excuse for the action, he needs to communicate something to you about the issue.
Find out why he refuses to say something. If none of this works you have to decide if you can live with this behavior.
Does it matter at this point? He’s terrible to you, you clearly are miserable, and you know he’s a cheater. It doesn’t matter with who or if the kids are his, the point is he is awful and you need to leave him regardless. Let him deal with whatever fallout there is.
You just bring it up and say what’s on your mind. You are feeling bad. I don’t think it’s a big deal if she was feeling bad too. I’m sure her intentions were good but I would not get hot in suggestive poses in front of my husband’s friend. I would rather go to a stranger to do them if I was set on them rather then my husband’s friend, because I would assume my husband wouldn’t want his friend seeing me hard and in porn star poses. Your friend is also very shady for suggesting this to your wife behind your back. Bad vibes all around.
Also please note that boudoir is not typically very hot. As another commenter said, then are usually tasteful and suggestive. Not flat out nude. So your friend definitely pushed some boundaries and took things to an extreme.
This is a super shitty situation. I'm so sorry, OP.
On another note, you should really ask your wife if she signed any kind of documents before he took these pictures. Ask if he had her sign some sort of contract, model release, transfer of copyright, etc. This could very quickly become a more complicated situation if he decides to display these photos in his portfolio. While this is not legal advice and I am not a lawyer, I could see this going south and ending up in a court where he is arguing the copyright ownership and your wife is arguing for her right to privacy (depending on your location or course).
Well look at that, a logical answer that sees the other person's perspective.
It is not always a bad thing. You should have some emotional awareness to not end up being a creep and ensure that you are with woman who actually wants you. I don't remember any such “hints of rejection” with my wife while I was dating her. But there may be too much of it, or you can even treat their signals wrongly. I would try improving your communication skills.
Yeah by that logic my wife sometimes even enjoys to watch me cheating on her with Geralt of Rivia
I feel like thank you isn’t enough to express my appreciation for your words. I am so excited for my future and my new relationship with myself. This past week I visited a rage room twice and had the time of my life. There are so many things I’m looking forward to do especially now that i can experience them fully as my own person. Thank you a million times. ❤️
What a tool. Sorry you had to find out, but better now than after being married with kids. Study very hot! The best revenge is a life well lived with love and happiness. Move on from this unpleasant human.
Amanda is an adult! If she doesn’t understand why you left, she is an entitled brat and is choosing anger for no reason.
I wish mine had your enthusiasm. I would settle for once every two days at this point (prefer twice a day)